I had a good class today. Solid. My standing head to knee was the strongest and easiest it's ever been. I was kinda shocked actually. But as long as I flex both thigh muscles, I'm set. I think for so long I was putting a lot of weight into my hands rather than flexing the lifted thigh. By doing so, you're not just using your arms to hold the leg up. It's little stuff like this that you only learn by doing regularly. Some days I'm just not in tune with certain poses or particular body parts and other days I am and that's when I learn.
I also battled with envy today. There's a couple of students who are excellent and I am envious. (NOTE: This is a random photo of an excellent student somewhere in North America being taught by Bikram, himself.) I had to work pretty hard in the beginning to set my focus on myself and no one else. Really, though, I just want to watch them and stand slack-jawed at their prowess. I find I have to put a pleasant smile on my face so that I stop looking so disappointed in myself. Someday, I will hold my poses just the same way. But I also realized that I have so many amazing opportunities and skills that they will never have. For instance, one of those students I overheard to be a financial analyst of some sort. God help that person. I thought, at least they have their yoga to bring them some sort of happiness because for me to be a financial whatchamacallit, I'd probably want to do a terrible wrong to myself. I know, that's very narrow-minded and egotistical of me to say that but really, what I mean, is at least they have a hobby that brings them spiritual fulfillment because, in my opinion, to work with money in big business is to walk a dangerous moral and ethical line. In fact, more people in big business should do yoga rather than beefing up at the gym. I'm standing on a soapbox right now, sure, but it's just my humble opinion that can be easily ignored.
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